Euro 08 wrap-up

Team of the Tournament

GK Casillas (we'll have to take u; first goalie to lift e Henri Delaunay)

RB Sergio Ramos (stand-out wingback in a tournament of wingbacks who redefined e attackin defender; hard in e tackle, fierce on e offence)
CB Pepe (only true CB to make e team; was good at Real Madrid's winning season, was e star for Portugal this time; small stature belies his defending abilities, and like all Brazil-born defenders, can be a dangerous offensive weapon)
RCB Corluka (another impressive wingback, selected simply because he can be a CB as well and there are seriously no other CBs who stood out)
LB Lahm (minor blunders here and there cannot hide e fact this dwarf is world class; personally, hes e last person i want to come up against if im a winger; scored last-gasp winner in e semi-final, shut out Silva in e final)

RW Schweinsteiger (one of Germany's stars in recent years, incomprehensible why he didnt start e tournament; other than e sending-off, his mobility, tricks, and deadballs prove Germans are not bland)
CM Xavi (Player of Tournament, has to be first name on teamsheet; passing and playmaking supremo; made 84% passes against Germany, made 91% during e highly congested match with Sweden, amazing)
CM Sneijder (gets my nod ahead of Modric because he not just showed e world his real class, he also scored and played like hes a league above others)
LW Podolski (forward or winger, every time he gets e ball u feel something's gonna happen; a sure bet for scoring goals)

ST Villa (tournament Golden Boot has to feature, even though he fizzled out in latter stages; the Spanish frontline is so good because it makes things happen out of nothing; fearless and always harrying defenders)
ST Torres (his presence alone struck fear into markers; e chief architect, more than Villa; goals do not matter if u contributed as much as he did, and anyway he has a midfield who can score any day)

Reserves:
Buffon (ever-reliable)
Akinfeev (one for e future)
Grosso (Germany '06's star performer left out at start of tournament, but after he came on never lost his place again; one of e creative forces of a stale Italy)
van Bronckhorst (outperformed expectations of this traveller; actually looked refreshing)
Zhirkov (he doesn look pretty, he doesn play pretty, but u know ur lookin at a key player when half e time e camera's on him; horse-like stamina, was still gallopin in extra-time)
Servet Cetin (ok finally another CB who did well)
Sabri Sarioglu (supporting Turkey's many lost causes from e back)
Bosingwa (was an early stand-out wingback, but Portugal sucked)
Senna (should be in e first eleven, just unfortunate hes a defensive midfielder and we all love flair players; his importance to e Spanish conquest cannot be underestimated)
Modric (i love this player; one of two players i would definitely bring on, e other being Arshavin)
Iniesta (full of running and always an eye for goal, he and Xavi outshone their Barca teammates; e supreme template of e free-role midfielder)
Silva (blew hot and cold, but still consistent enough to star for Spain; effectively one-footed but sky-high confident; attacked much taller and bigger opponents endlessly)
Robben (his form is back, and that's scary, because this is a world class match-winner)
van Persie (another match-winner so adept at sneakin around stealthily; has unbelievable technique)
Arshavin (for that semi-final performance, u cant be in e first eleven, but boy were u a match-winner)
Hakan Yakin (only group-stage player to make it into this dream team, for still being that Swiss inspiration and scoring goals for a poor side)
Ballack (deserves respect for draggin Germany almost single-handedly to e final, but honestly many times it was his below-par performances that put them in those shit)
Mehmet Aurelio (gets a place for a lesson in "how to shackle Ballack")
Tuncay Sanli (midfield general of Turkey and one of their star performers)
Arda Turan (if u wanna know how Turkey play like that, he may be a good spokesman)
de Rossi (he may not be e playmaker Donadoni wants, but selecting him at least ensured u get both a destroyer and an attackin threat, so why not)
van der Vaart (last of e deadly Dutch triumvirate; doesn explode, but always dangerous)
Deco (no doubt e soul of Portugal, when he plays, they purr)
Srna (an ordinary player turned good; plays a simple game, but in e end made other more stunnin wingers read:Ronaldo look aimless)
Nihat Kahveci (first name to roll of ur tongue for Turkey, so he gets a place; scored one of tournament's best goals against Cech)
Semih Senturk (e man to bring on when things look crap; e new supersub)
Cassano (left out early, but became e star of an idea-less side; his creativity is refreshing among e many formula Italians)
van Nistelrooy (not an outstanding tournament, but e world-best centre forward's average game usually is good enough)
Mutu (as e star of Romania he deserves a place here, because his team fared well, without much credit, in e Group of Death; shouldered nation's hopes)
Pavlyuchenko (surprised many by handling e lone striker role so much better than other more illustrious names; this guy shoots for fun, from anywhere, so u can bet he'll score)
Olic (tireless; prime example of e Croat force)


Team of the Tournament (the one ur Sunday team would want to try playing)

Cech (how uncharacteristic; no one would have believed ur arguably e best in e world)
Nikopolidis (for being part of Greece '04)

Dellas (for being part of Greece '04; at least Charisteas scored a goal)
Abidal (terribly ineffective this time round)
Thuram (time u move on)
Jansen (clown of e tournament)
Mertesacker (mainstay all thru to final, but that doesn hide e fact tt hes just a big bunglin ogre)
Materazzi (still as bad; got dropped from the first eleven)
Paulo Ferreira (whoever believes hes a decent player needs to clean his glasses)

Cristiano Ronaldo (sorry, just not good enough from "e best player on e planet")
Malouda (u sure ur e man who lit up Germany '06?)
Vieira (gave him a place in e 23 and he cldnt be fit enough to play)

Anelka (ur just not international calibre)
Henry (ur prime's over, take it graciously)
Baros (still e man Czech Republic turns to, but huffed and puffed ineffectively with a nation's weight killing him)
Mario Gomez (big reputation, but made e goal look like a golf hole)
Toni (given e ultimate lone striker role and scored nil)