i like motion pictures

i went in assuming what many would - That Girl in Pinafore is a rip-off of 那些年，我们一起追的女孩.

i came out thinking: it probably is, but by looking past the obvious flaws, it's also a film with a lot of heart, and one that surely strikes closer to home than 那些年.


this post may be titled as such, but it's in fact less about a movie than about our way of life, the Singapore story. what do you remember about the 90s? whether you know it or not, Xinyao probably played some part in your story.

make no mistake, there's lots of shortcomings in this film. for a film, being called "lame" is probably one of the biggest insults. at the top of my list, the direction too is mediocre. yet you get a sense that Chai Yee Wei still might be the best person to lead the project. after all, i read the director's a huge Xinyao fan.

direction aside, his screenplay is commendable - or, using my synonym, unbelievable. how so? it's quite impressive how Chai squeezed so many nuggets of 90s life in. i can't say i relate completely to that period but since those that struck a chord were already quite awesome, i can't imagine how it is for someone who can relate completely.

the schooling days (surely more so than 那些年), the lingo (how every generation of youths speak differently), taking one too many buses (before the advent of map apps and gothere), phone calls (the landline sort) and boy-girl banter... so on and so forth.

the dark underbelly received airtime too - the strict, ambitious parent preaching an "English education", and underlying, passive racism, for instance.

and talking about Xinyao, that's where Chai (and Liang Wern Fook without a doubt) really comes to the fore. i also can't say i know Xinyao well, yet the film, its music, and its soul genuinely moved me.

just like how i would discuss this film with anyone, the plot is rightfully secondary to what is essentially an homage to Xinyao.

one nuance: when May asks Jiaming if he's singing his love for her, he instead says he's singing about the coconuts. as a student of Literature, i was completely blown away. between the lines, Jiaming seems to nudge May. Xinyao itself was very much poetry, wasn't it? when the masters of that era saturated simple lyrics with such deep references. it can be about coconuts, while it also can be about my love for you. by doing this Xinyao also captures, as it always does, an idiosyncrasy of that Singapore, when overt affection wasn't common.

what's not a nuance, at least judging from the moviegoers' reaction, was the turn of the plot and the lack of a happy ending.

i thought it's so apt, entirely consistent with Xinyao's DNA. Xinyao sings of a generation, of ideals balanced with reality. Xinyao is optimistic, but it's also life, and not all stories have a happy ending. its optimism celebrates the generation and life.

拍的是爱情 与友情 讲的是新谣. 新谣唱的是人生 而人生就是有起有落. 它唱的年代和理想 你怎么把握 只有今天的你知道. 新谣从未追求天长地久 只祝福你珍惜曾经拥有. 这应该就是细水长流的意思吧.

my final thought: there are great films that you can watch many times. and there are bad movies that you watch just once. then there are the rare films you can also only watch once - for the right reasons.

我身旁 我朋友

很奇妙地 你那天再次坐上我车 我旁边

好奇怪的感觉

那 又陌生 又熟悉

原来已经三年了

还能谈大家的感情事 你真的是和我散得最好的情人

虽然这让我感到更亏欠 但我也很珍惜现在的你

上有天堂 下有天台

当年写“屋顶”时 脑海浮现的就是推开门后 那个浪漫理想世界

六年前“不能说的秘密”的成功 大家关注周杰伦接下来导什么样的电影

就像“不能说的秘密”给你的惊喜 “天台”不是部普通的电影 它是部歌武片 不是歌舞片
“一般歌舞片 突然唱歌，我要让歌舞片合理化 符合逻辑”

找投资家时 很难解释周杰伦要拍什么 可是就像他的音乐 周式R&B就是跟西方R&B不同味道 你看了就知道周杰伦在拍什么
“我的重点就是要让大家没话说”

拍“天台”讲究保密 演员签了几个月 开拍前一星期才大概知道电影的故事 前一晚才收到剧本 到现场又收到更改的纸条
电影原声带提前寄给剧组 也得调频率和remix 因为周杰伦不管是编剧或编曲 都是他创作的一种

拍“天台” 一大前提是发扬华人片 吓老外 参展得奖 为华人争光的使命感
要国际化 就得拍外国人看得懂的华人片
“如果再不拍华人歌舞片 就会被别人拍走”
“不管做什么 一定要第一”

天才周杰伦 天马行空 日理万机 导戏 教戏 演主角 剪接 编曲 一切坚持自己来
有时候开完演唱会当晚 还筹备电影到两，三点
周杰伦的僵直性脊椎炎 常常半夜痛到睡不着爬起来 就开始构思隔天的戏 台词 编曲

周杰伦亲自保证 预告片剪的已经是最不精彩的 精彩的都留在戏院

“老实讲 没有所谓的平常心 我要做我就是要赢 不然我干嘛做”

本来好像没完全被“天台”说服 听周杰伦讲解之后 像他的音乐 就突然有了新一层的领悟于感动

看着指尖 已经如烟

one of the greatest song lyrics i've seen in Mandopop.

我坐在床前
望着窗外

回忆满天
生命是华丽错觉
时间是贼

偷走一切

七岁的那一年
抓住那只蝉
以为能抓住夏天
十七岁的那年
吻过他的脸
就以为和他能永远

有没有那麽一种永远
永远不改变
拥抱过的美丽都再也不破碎
让险峻岁月不能在脸上撒野
让生离和死别都遥远
有谁能听见

我坐在床前
转过头看

谁在沉睡
那一张苍老的脸
好像是我紧闭双眼

曾经是爱我的
和我深爱的
都围绕在我身边
带不走的那些
遗憾和眷恋
就化成最後一滴泪

有没有那麽一滴眼泪
能洗掉後悔
化成大雨降落在回不去的街
再给我一次机会将故事改写
还欠了他一生的

一句抱歉

有没有那麽一个世界
永远不天黑
星星太阳万物都听我的指挥
月亮不忙着圆缺春天不走远
树梢紧紧拥抱着树叶
有谁能听见

耳际眼前此生重演
是我来自漆黑
而又回归漆黑
人间瞬间天地之间
下次我又是谁

有没有那麽一朵玫瑰
永远不凋谢
永远骄傲和完美永远不妥协
为何人生最後会像一张纸屑
还不如一片花瓣
曾经鲜艳

有没有那麽一张书签
停止那一天
最单纯的笑脸和最美那一年
书包里面装满了蛋糕和汽水
双眼只有无猜和无邪
让我们无法无天

有没有那麽一首诗篇
找不到句点
青春永远定居在我们的岁月
男孩和女孩都有吉他和舞鞋
笑忘人间的苦痛
只有甜美

有没有那麽一个明天
重头活一遍
让我再次感受曾挥霍的昨天
无论生存或生活我都不浪费
不让故事这麽的後悔
有谁能听见

我不要告别

我坐在床前
看着指尖已经如烟

傻笑

今天

遇见长得很像你的她

那股情感又冲回来

失去自觉

看着她十分钟

她突然傻笑

我也笑了

因为她的傻笑和你一样

---

我因为笑了也才发觉

那股冲回来的情感

不再一样

已不是可惜

你的回忆

是微笑

i like motion pictures

what launched it to the summit of Singapore's box office is a Jack Neo trademark - a knack for themes close to Singaporeans' hearts. also typical are the to-and-fros - almost excessive - of idiosyncratic jokes and moving snippets.

it is not one of his better films - far from it. some parts are squirmingly cheesy and the fact that Mindef didnt subsidise costs doesn't pardon the blatant product pla
cements.

but once in a long while, we can make this snotty remark:

it is not a superb film but it is an important one. Ah Boys to Men, unlike Army Daze, is a compendium of military anecdotes, allowing those who haven't been there get intimate access. for those who have, it is a reminder of what NS is about. the lesson, overlooked by some, is important for all: it was never about stripes, bars or 'crabs', never about whether we'd go to war. your biggest enemy is yourself and victory lies in you standing up to adversity. 没有国, 哪有家. for those who slithered through NS, this is equally a reminder that for whatever success you've achieved the rest of your life, when the going got tough, you didnt get going.

put it this way: at the risk of advertising the damn film, if you haven't done NS you should watch it, simply to better empathise with the sacrifices and psychological battles of your boyfriend, husband, brother.

moments of the Games

Singapore, Innsbruck, London. in a short two years i've been to three Olympics. can't say there's another bigger fulfilment of my childhood sports reporting dream.

London 2012, my first main Games, outstripped the rest easily in terms of scale and emotions. here are for me the moments of this Games.

1.

if Beijing was remembered for two names out of the thousands of athletes who are world-class in their own right, London might just be as well. it wasn't quite Michael Phelps headlining Part One and Usain Bolt Part Two again. sure, Bolt did, but Phelps pulled away and cemented his Most Decorated Olympian status that will be here to stay for a while.

whether the Baltimore Bullet is the greatest is no doubt arguable, but six medals here of any colour put him at 22 all-time, easily overtaking Larissa Latynina's 18. Phelps had an average (by his standards) swansong, swimming to a wtf fourth place in the 400m IM and losing his pet 200m fly to 20-year-old Chad le Clos, but it just made his eight-gold milestone four years ago look sick.

he wasn't the star of this Games; he transcended it. mind you, Phelps' collection of gold medals alone equal Latynina's total.

2.

i'm not too impressed by Bolt's claim to be a "living legend", but the fact is he has become the first human being to achieve an Olympic sprint double, or sprint triple if you include his 4x100m relay golds. not even Carl Lewis or Michael Johnson managed that. he is now the world-record holder in all three events, so it is fair to label him the fastest man ever.

still, the big picture is, London provided possibly the greatest Olympic track event, which says a lot since athletics is the centrepiece of the five-ring movement. in a first, the blue-riband race featured the four fastest men in history -- Tyson Gay, Asafa Powell, Yohan Blake and Bolt -- plus Athens 2004 champ Justin Gatlin, and ended with all but one dipping under 10s. the eighth, Powell, did not because he pulled his groin.

two other track stars mentioned in the same breath as Bolt here were David Rudisha and Mo Farah, two Africans of slightly different distances and of vastly different journeys.

from that great lung-bursting territory of Kenya, Rudisha has been christened by world media "the greatest runner you've never heard of". he smashed his own 800m world record here in front of a crowd proud of their own middle-distance tradition, but what set the achievement apart was the difficulty of the race -- six of his seven foes that day ran personal bests, the last-placed fella was the quickest slowest ever. Rudisha overcame them all.

Farah was born in Somalia but moved to England at the age of 8. he's now as English as anyone. and with a vociferous crowd behind him, Farah did not capitulate, winning the long-distance double in style.

elsewhere, an almost-35 Felix Sanchez turned back the clock to beat a strong 400m hurdles field. the Dominican stuck a photo of him and his late grandma under his bib, and the motivation from the skies gave him extra legs. his granny raised him but died the day he was to race in Beijing. he crumbled then and vowed to win a medal for her eventually.

combined events are seldom big, but local girl Jessica Ennis captured imaginations with a field-crushing performance. her hurdles, especially, was a best-ever 12.54s. significance? this timing would have placed her 4th in the hurdles individual event.

captivating performances aside, the track also threw up some apt Olympic lore. American 4x400m runner Manteo Mitchell ran half a lap with -- you won't believe it --a goddamn broken leg. "It felt like somebody literally just snapped my leg in half."

yea that's the kind of pain, if you can relate. but Mitchell, his team's lead runner, didn't want to let his mates down. "I figured it's what almost any person would've done in that situation."

he completed his lap in 46.1s. Johnson's world record is 43.18s.

the other drama that one thought couldn't take another turn was Liu Xiang. champion in Athens, injured and couldn't start in Beijing in front of an expectant home support, and now in possibly his final Olympics Liu did go off but cleared not one hurdle. injury curse struck again. the great Chinese hope is no more. a lot of conspiracy theories swirling around now, but Liu did gain the approval of the London spectators -- he hopped the length of the track to a roaring ovation.

athletics did so much more for this Games. for the first time in history, there was no American in the men's 400m final. the relay quartet were then upset by the Bahamas. there was however some consolation for an overall underwhelming track performance by the US -- the 4x100m women's team broke a 27-year-old world record, while its likeable star Allyson Felix finally won a first and well-deserved individual gold. sprint powerhouse Jamaica were also ruthless in dominating the US -- it swept a 1-2-3 in the men's 200m.

3.

not all the "moments" took place during the Games or inside the arena. organisers gave the arriving world a worry when it was revealed mega security firm G4S could not deliver its promise of 10,000 personnel. as a result the military was activated to top up the numbers.

liberal democracy also gave a post-Beijing Olympic movement a rude awakening. for weeks up till the Opening Ceremony, there were striking threats from bus and taxi drivers to customs, tube and train workers. the government dug deep into its pockets to appease many of whom were opportunists.

midway through the Games, the military was given a new order -- attend the sports events. organisers were left red-faced after so-called VIPs did not turn up, leaving thousands of high-demand seats empty. it led to an outcry from the British public, and unable to solve the problem, organisers readied soldiers to sit in.

another sort of Guard-of-Honour for Tony Tan.

4.

lighting the cauldron has to be a "moment". this act at London's Opening Ceremony was even more anticipated as the ritual was kept top secret in a country known for its extreme transparency (plus David Beckham sort of lost his right after being dropped from the football team). but eventually, i don't know what to make of it -- Becks and Sir Steve Redgrave each had a part to play, but the Olympic flame was collectively lit by former Olympians and a bunch of youths.

5.

gymnastics managed to earn a few more inches in the papers this time. making the giant stride were five tiny girls, newly dubbed 'Fierce Five', for Americans Gabby Douglas, Aly Raisman, McKayla Maroney, Jordyn Wieber and Kyla Ross whambammed opponents into surrender. they were simply too good, too superior, too perfect in a sport that was always much closer than this. someone probably mentioned "Dream Team" too much prior to the Olympics and the girls began thinking it referred to them.

wasn't all good news though. world champion Wieber didn't even make the final in the individual all-around. rules state only two per country can qualify. Wieber was as usual darn good, but she was fourth and ahead of her included Douglas and Raisman. no problem for the US -- Douglas proceeded to pummel Russians Viktoria Komova and 2010 champ Aliya Mustafina in the final.

6.

Oscar Pistorius became the first amputee to compete at the Olympics, running in the 400m and 4x400m.

7.

they won't beat the original Dream Team, but USA Basketball's 2012 gold medal-winning crop posted the heaviest defeat in history, brushing Nigeria aside 156-73. in the 40-minute game, Carmelo Anthony scored also a record 37 points in less than 15 minutes of game time. the team totalled another record 29 three-pointers, as star men Lebron James and Kobe Bryant sat out the second half.

8.

the blot on this impressive Olympics was one so big it questioned the whole idea of sports. after having taken an oath of "respecting and abiding by the rules... in the true spirit of sportsmanship", four pairs of badminton players attempted to rig the draw by playing to lose. they were all disqualified, but i feel for the Koreans and Indonesians, as they were merely reacting to the world number one Chinese, who wanted to lose so as to avoid their compatriots until the final. it's a shame the BWF never acted on China's scheming ways and it reared its ugly head here at the biggest stage of them all.

9.

of course local papers were all about Team GB, but taken in perspective, Britain did perform outstandingly, its 29 gold medals and third place overall the team's best haul for more than a century, despite a slow start.

if all the talk before this Games was of Redgrave, now it's about Sir Chris Hoy. the Scottish cyclist overtook the rower to become Britain's most successful Olympian, owning six gold medals.

 

Bradley Wiggins rode on his Tour de France high to grab another gold medal here, and with seven Olympic medals in all, is joint most decorated British Olympian.

the final shining light was Ben Ainslie, whose fourth gold makes him the greatest Olympic sailor, and the first-ever athlete to medal at five Olympic Games.

10.

minor alarm for everyone when a media bus knocked over a citizen cyclist and killed him.

11.

to a minor sport that isn't minor for powerhouse China, the nearest blow to its unsurprising medal sweep happened in the 4th round of the men's singles. Vladimir Samsonov is good, one of the best Europeans ever, but not many gave him a shot against the haloed world number one Zhang Jike. but the Belarussian came out fearless, made Zhang look ordinary at times, and was twice just four points from winning. as envisioned, Zhang destroyed everyone else in London.

12.

traditionally the partner to athletics as the Olympics' rah-rah sports, swimming didn't disappoint here. other than the imminent retirement of Phelps, most of the talk were about heir presumptive Ryan Lochte and the possible domination of the pool by the Australian nation.

interesting then that we are bidding farewell to Phelps and welcoming Lochte, who is actually 11 months older than his rival. Lochte has been around for a while, was at Athens and Beijing, but fact is he wasn't a 15-year-old Olympic finalist like Phelps. the New Yorker really arrived as the next backstroke king in 2007 when he set two world records within two hours, including beating legend Aaron Peirsol. he cemented that title at the following year's Olympics by beating Peirsol again. Lochte went on to be a key member of the US freestyle relay teams, but the challenge on Phelps really came when he proved his all-rounded excellence in the medley events. he first broke Phelps' world record in 2009, before defeating him in a competitive race in 2010. the next two years were basically 'Lochte time' as he consistently triumphed over Phelps.

as we know by now, Phelps took most of the headlines in London. Lochte managed a modest five medals. disappointingly, he lost the shorter medley race to his great foe, was third in his pet backstroke event and couldn't medal in the 200m freestyle. although his achievements make him the second most successful swimmer, observers have called his campaign underwhelming.

Down Under, it was sheer disaster. often cited as a proud swimming country, Australia put in their worst showing in 20 years, winning only one gold. there were none in individual swims, for a lineup boasting James Magnussen, James Roberts, Stephanie Rice and Alicia Coutts, and the last time Australia failed to do that, Mao Zedong was still leader of China.

the one they let slip that would be remembered was the 4x100m freestyle relay. despite being an extremely competitive event, the Australian men touted "Weapons of Mass Destruction" were expected to win it. eventually they were relegated to fourth, while the other plot was of France avenging their photo-finish loss to the US four years ago. this time a low-profile team anchored by the superb Yannick Agnel overhauled the Yanks.

elsewhere the meet was defined by youth. a pair of 15-year-olds gripped the world, Katie Ledecky smashing her 800m opponents by at least four seconds, unfancied Ruta Meilutyte winning the breaststroke sprint.

but the story of youth and swimming belonged to Ye Shiwen. the Chinese 16-year-old won both medleys, but it was in the 400m she wrote herself into Olympic lore. she beat the silver medallist by three seconds, broke the world record by more than a second, and in one Olympics chopped five seconds off her personal best. even more shockingly, her final freestyle leg was faster than Lochte's, the male champion. defeating stars like Alicia Coutts, Elizabeth Beisel, Stephanie Rice and Kirsty Coventry, Ye is the new face of China's explosive rise in the sport.

a season-defining summer market?

another transfer deadline, although for the EPL it was anything but routine. quite a blockbuster i would say. for some revolutionary, for others fiddly, but significant for all.

the following are for me the English clubs that mattered this window.

Chelsea

some media have highlighted them as somehow sneaking under the radar, and it is true, we need to pay attention. Eden Hazard was all the talk for a while, but as the Blues did most of their business some time back, people ignored them.

at your own risk though. Chelsea have probably come off this summer with the most valuable harvest. Belgian prodigy Hazard is making everyone excited with his performances, but while he is the only new name in the starting lineup, the club has also acquired the talented Marko Marin, who played for Germany at World Cup 2010, and another playmaking wonderkid Oscar.

Oscar, partner-in-crime to Neymar.

imagine the offence this side can put together over the next few years.

elsewhere, Victor Moses looks ordinary in comparison, while Chelsea also managed to steal ex Osasuna and Marseille rightback Cesar Azpilicueta, tipped for the Spanish national team soon.

all these inflow are after all to fill big shoes. perennial bogeyman Salomon Kalou switched teams with Hazard after six years and injury-ravaged powerhouse Michael Essien is loaned out. fringe player Jose Bosingwa has left too, but the biggest shoes are those of club legend Didier Drogba, who's quit after eight years.

"Nico, what am I doing in China?"

up-and-coming star Josh McEachran stays out on loan while Yossi Benayoun finally departs.

Manchester United

another championship lost, another reaction. easily United's heaviest expenditure in years, the last time we spent big was the £30m in 2008 for Dimitar Berbatov, who has incidentally just left for Fulham. for the last time we poured out £50m in one window was way back in 2003, then including a boy from Madeira.

Guess who?

over the years a lot of our income have been used to cover the owners' debt, as Sir Alex Ferguson pursued a buy-youth-for-less policy.

much of this summer's £50m have gone towards securing Robin van Persie and Shinji Kagawa, in moves perceived as the dawn of a new age at Old Trafford. Kagawa arrived in the aftermath of Hazard's rejection, but at half the price is good value as the Red Devils' latest playmaker. the acquisition to flaunt though is league top scorer van Persie. he may be 29, but £24m for guaranteed goals, no need to acclimatise, and moreover emptying rivals Arsenal, is unbelievable business.

Robin van Persie has struck four goals from just 12 shots.

with a refreshed attacking model, pushing even Javier Hernandez down the pecking order, it was no surprise former top scorers Berbatov and Michael Owen have been released. Fabio is loaned out to get him back to his best, but a tinge of sadness accompanies the departures of an old and a young -- Asia's hero Park Ji Sung and the talented Paul Pogba.

Arsenal

it's just fitting we go from the raider to the raided. like previous seasons, North London just got a few more mansions for sale. following van Persie out the Emirates door is another first-teamer Alex Song. not the most illustrious around, yet Song created 13 goals for the Gunners last season. Barcelona the suitor is puzzling though.

the arrivals are exciting any other time, especially compared to the panic buys of Mikel Arteta and Per Mertesacker, but it's dampened by the departures. i had commented i didn't know how Arsene Wenger would deploy them together, but a triumvirate of Lukas Podolski, Olivier Giroud and RVP still sounded scary. that's not possible now, and suddenly Arsenal need Pods and Giroud to step up, always too much to ask from them.

they do however possess Santi Cazorla now, a squad member for Spain at both triumphant Euros, an achievement in itself. i had thought Santi wouldn't be game-changing, but he's been given a key role now and seems to relish it.

Santi Cazorla's joining a bigger club soon, just so you know.

Italian giants Juventus see something in delusional joke Nicklas Bendtner and have ended his England charade.

Nicklas Bendtner will soon fulfill his potential as the planet's best footballer.

Manchester City

snubbed over and over again, the champions finally stamped their oil-rich authority on deadline day. Jack Rodwell and Scott Sinclair are underwhelming for the defending champions, but then Javi Garcia, Maicon and Matija Nastasic happened. the latter is one for the future but already touted as the new Vidic. Maicon was after all one of the world's best rightbacks while Garcia has rejuvenated his career at Benfica.

the foremost question for City round the clock is how to keep a vast squad happy. the key departures are Nigel de Jong, Adam Johnson and banished frontman Emmanuel Adebayor. Garcia fits into de Jong's role, a position Roberto Mancini ludicrously calls 'desperately lacking', but Maicon has to challenge Micah Richards and Pablo Zabaleta, Rodwell may not be a guaranteed starter and Sinclair should be happy to make the bench.

Maicon joined Man City to be third-choice rightback.

Tottenham

Spurs are a bigger club than Liverpool, period. hahaha.

having got that out of the way, one worries if Andre Villas-Boas is again trying too hard to revamp a team. the former Chelsea boss shipped out Rafael van der Vaart, Niko Kranjcar, Vedran Corluka, Louis Saha, Steven Pienaar and Giovani dos Santos after only 180 minutes of this 2012-13 season. mind you, every of the above is still capable of peaking.

less to do with AVB's wishes, star player Luka Modric finally got a dream move to Real Madrid, while captain Ledley King retired.

end of an era for Luka Modric and Ledley King.

on the bright side for fans still reeling from idol Harry Redknapp's sacking, AVB's buys have been eye-catching. there is promise -- the exciting Belgian duo Moussa Dembele and Eredivisie player of the year Jan Vertonghen, and Gylfi Sigurdson. there is France number one Hugh Lloris. most of all and most surprising of all, there is Clint Dempsey guaranteeing goals from deep.

Redknapp's work is bearing fruit and Tottenham are attracting star names.

Liverpool

Spice Boys did better than Luis Suarez and his £100m mates.

what can get worse for the Kop? they will point to the start of Roy Hodgson's reign. then now a mixed emotion towards club legend Kenny Dalglish. then 8th in the league. currently, except for a creditable 2-2 draw with Man City, they've sucked bad and are lying in the relegation zone.

Brendan Rodgers tried. immediately Andy Carroll was publicly deemed surplus. other previous horrors Charlie Adam, Alberto Aquilani and Maxi Rodriguez were sold.

the grand plan to turn Liverpool into Swansea (what?) could start nowhere but by bringing Joe Allen and Fabio Borini with him. then, maybe if Real Madrid could upend Barcelona using Mesut Oezil and Sami Khedira, Rodgers could do with his own pair of Turkish-Germans -- Nuri Sahin and the prolific teenager Samed Yesil.

let's see. the transfer window already hasn't been kind. key members Dirk Kuyt and Craig Bellamy are gone. Jay Spearing is also deemed not needed for at least a year.

Everton

across town, after finishing above rivals Liverpool, the Toffees are having their version of a revamp. biggest stars Tim Cahill and Rodwell are gone, longtime servant Joseph Yobo finally leaves.

but David Moyes is always dependable and their start to the campaign has been alright. the highly-acclaimed Kevin Mirallas looks set to be a hit, while Rangers star Steven Naismith represents a major coup after the Scottish club folded.

Swansea

lower down the table, one club worth noticing is the Swans. i mean, who doesn't, since they play some of the most attractive ball in this country. but Rodgers is out and Michael Laudrup is in. no one needs tissue for that.

some say the former merely continued a style implemented by Roberto Martinez, who continues to thrill at Wigan. but here we have Laudrup, a legendary player, a Barcelona alumnus, a coach roundly admired.

he's lost Allen and Sinclair, from the class of 2011-12, but that wasn't within his control. in come experienced Spaniards Michu, Chico and Pablo Hernandez. Jonathan de Guzman is also a fantastic addition to a team like Swansea, while Korean star Ki Sung Yeung brings a style similar to the team's.

already four goals in first three games for Michu.

these are exciting times for Swansea fans.

West Ham

if there's one lesser light busy this window, it's the newly-promoted Hammers. nothing new to the Premier League where teams buy to avoid instant relegation.

West Ham lost former England number one Robert Green, went out to purchase a bunch of goalkeepers, and now they have Jussi Jaaskelainen. but they have indeed considerably strengthened the squad. Liverpool flop Carroll seems to excel in a smaller club, joined up front now by ex Sochaux star Modibo Maiga. key Wolves winger Matt Jarvis headed here after his team's relegation, while James Collins returned.

the coup though might be Alou Diarra, a former France captain who's been to two World Cups and most recently Euro 2012.
 

West Ham now have someone who played alongside Zinedine Zidane.

key players released free in the summer include John Carew, Abdoulaye Faye, Julien Faubert and Papa Bouba Diop.

QPR

this piece would not be complete without the madness at Loftus. if Rangers couldn't compete with the most expensive signings, they did it with the most signings.

Spain's colonisation of England continues here, Esteban Granero becoming Mark Hughes' marquee acquisition from Real Madrid. the talented Junior Hoilett finally leaves Blackburn although QPR are expected to struggle equally, while Stephane Mbia adds quality as well.

a lot of experience gathered too. the decorated Park possesses the full set of medals there are available, Green and former Ballon d'Or nominee Julio Cesar replace number one Paddy Kenny in goal, then there are Ryan Nelsen, Andy Johnson and Jose Bosingwa, who add 95 years to the squad.

...while QPR's goalie once ranked behind only Iker Casillas and Gigi Buffon.

Hughes gets Fabio on loan in another friendship deal involving Fergie and a former player.

out the door go skipper Joey Barton, a class but problematic player, as well as top scorer Heidar Helguson. veteran Welsh international Danny Gabbidon has been released.

we'll miss you, Joey.

Lance

i believed in Lance Armstrong. that was as clear as crystal.

but the various changes to the plot this past week have to me bordered on the absurd. what played out has been a very very tricky situation and to take sides really does no one any good.

Armstrong isn't just iconic for winning the brutal Tour de France in the gruelling sport of cycling. seven times. making him the greatest cyclist ever. Armstrong claimed that yellow jersey again and again after defeating cancer, not your ordinary benign kind, he was told by doctors death was likelier than survival.

his Livestrong foundation for cancer has raised $470 million, while the circulation for his iconic yellow wristbands stands at 80 million worldwide.

i challenge you to find a greater sportsman.

no doubt he's a controversial figure, but don't blame the sport. cycling's one of the most stringent and transparent sports on the planet. Armstrong can't be categorised with Floyd Landis or Tyler Hamilton.

then it happened -- Armstrong withdrew from contesting USADA charges. this is akin to discarding your gun in a pistol duel -- you're dead.

allegations have been aplenty since 2004, teammates, medical personnel, officials and insiders accusing him of doping and controlling a complex network that helped him evade prosecution. the fact, though, is that Armstrong has, in a career spanning hundreds of tests, never tested positive.

but look at the media coverage after his decision to quit. coverage was largely favourable to him, running stories of how fans believe in him, of how sponsors are standing by him. his full statement was published in my national paper, a statement even the man on the street would know is self-serving. in it he says:

"Enough is enough... I have been subjected to... Travis Tygart’s unconstitutional witch hunt. The toll this has taken on my family, and my work for our foundation and on me leads me to where I am today -- finished with this nonsense.

I had hoped that a federal court would stop USADA’s charade. Although the court... recognized the many improprieties and deficiencies in USADA’s motives, its conduct, and its process, the court ultimately decided that it could not intervene.

I refuse to participate in a process that is so one-sided and unfair.

From the beginning, this investigation has [been] about punishing me at all costs.

I know who won those seven Tours, my teammates know who won those seven Tours, and everyone I competed against knows who won those seven Tours... Nobody can ever change that.

I’m looking forward to an end to this pointless distraction."

the issue is clear -- when you're a public figure and you face accusations, you have to answer them, especially charges from an official body. true, USADA may be rubbish, but we can only slam the authorities that much. at the end of the day, we need to have faith in governing bodies to have faith in sports.

Armstrong may be exhausted, he may spit at USADA's motives. hell, he may even be innocent. but walking away is wrong.

by quitting, a cyclist who never knew how to quit leaves fans hanging. what's the conclusion, we beg?

what is truly behind the statement, we will never know. the cynic in me says Armstrong could be manipulating the public into cementing his legacy. if the courts had the chance to find him guilty, he would forever be labelled a cheat, right? what's clear is that Armstrong has a fairytale story and by walking away there'll always be people who'll buy that story.

for me? his decision is likely to strip him of his Tour de France wins and trigger other technical, obligatory sanctions.

i say, so be it.

for the good of sports, he deserves it.

asking the right questions

i don't want to join the wave of criticism against imported athletes. this essentially doesn't even stem from xenophobic grounds.

there'll be people who say it isn't appropriate for someone working in the press to opine.

i questioned myself, and i think it's right. because at the core i am right. and it is, to an extent, public interest.

this was what happened with the national table tennis women's team -- a few of whom i should declare i already held poor impressions of -- after they surrendered meekly to Japan in the Olympic semis.

the Singaporean press were waiting. Wang Yuegu and Li Jiawei knew we were there but looked poise to hurry off.

i managed to stop Wang and my question was, "what went wrong?"

there'll be people who say athletes are human and can be emotional. but this is the highest level of sports. a loser at Wimbledon or Augusta will answer it. i think it's a fair question.

she replied with a sarcastic laugh, "isn't this result normal? i think it's normal."

Singapore came into the tournament seeded third, overtaken by the Japanese merely weeks ago. yet the semi-final was a washout, Singapore winning one game out of 10, crashing 3-0.

i was both shocked and offended.

there'll be people who say i'm being anal especially since i don't "know" the local scene. well, i covered local sports four years ago, before many current reporters, and i tell you, this issue is chronic and toxic.

i shot back the best line i could, one i suspect the mainstream journos won't.

"does that mean you came into the match thinking you would lose?"

not surprisingly, and in the most unprofessional, least respectable way, she stormed off, not just from me, but from the whole Singaporean scrum.

i put in four years at journalism school, did several internships, worked with multiple companies in the field. am i overreacting? am i wrong somewhere i don't see?

there'll be people who say i'm letting myself be affected by nothing. i disagree. i think people who adopt that stance are jaded and don't care enough.

there'll be people who say a cordial relationship with local athletes is important. they're missing the point.

simply put, a national athlete is a public figure. like politicians or celebrities, they are responsible to the general populace, a responsibility not at their discretion but expected of.

to quantify it, national athletes are funded by taxpayers. it is of course trickier that foreign-born ones often "cost" more. within just this quantifiable formula alone, national athletes must be accountable.

this incident again throws the spotlight on public figures' unspoken obligations to the media. some newsmakers and members of society believe the media sensationalises things. i dare say, the landscape in Singapore doesn't breed such journalism. it is pathetic there are people who have their heads in the sand.

the press is merely a messenger.

note: this was penned immediately after the incident, and has not been influenced by any subsequent discussion or judgment

respect Kobe's bravery, but let's be realistic

and so the usually-savvy, ultra-cool Kobe Bryant has made a boo-boo which i suspect he sincerely believes in.

a member of one Olympic gold-medal team and going to his second Olympics -- after withdrawing in 2000 and 2004 -- the future HOFer claims the lineup heading to London is better than the Dream Team of 1992.

better than these jolly old fellas? you must be dreaming.

Kobe has slightly retreated from that stand, saying that maybe his current squad can't win a seven-game series but can in one game. the general public though aren't interested in details and have roundly criticised the LA Lakers guard.

Sir Charles Barkley and His Airness Michael Jordan were the first to fire their retorts, not too aggressively, both "laughing" at the suggestion.

1993's MVP Barkley believes the Dream Team would not just win, but by double digits. he further taunted that only LeBron James, Kevin Durant and Kobe himself would make the cut in 1992.

Jordan said, "For him to compare is not one of the smarter things he ever could have done.

"Remember now, they learned from us. We didn't learn from them.

"When they get 11 Hall of Famers, you call and ask me again."

a bit of arrogance, but a lot of sense.

the Dream Team's 12 players have 11 inducted into the sport's Hall of Fame. they beat every team at Barcelona by at least 32 points, and that only happened in the gold-medal game. their overall winning margin was 43.7 points.

there are critics who now say even the Redeem Team of 2008 is better than the current. that one featured Dwyane Wade and NBA's best centre Dwight Howard. this time, they and last year's MVP Derrick Rose are missing.

Blake Griffin (no.14) has been replaced by college grad Anthony Davis. go imagine.

one of Kobe's reasons is the Dream Team was "too old", but he is flat wrong. the majority were in their late 20s, in their prime. only Magic Johnson and Larry Bird were retiring.

Kobe himself will be 34 next month.

it is true the current roster look more athletic -- LeBron and Durant will be a handful in any generation -- and quick -- Russell Westbrook and Andre Iguodala are high-intensity players.

this is probably the Dream Team's one true weakness. but the Dream Team was also built on a defence probably unrivalled in history.

sharing a combined 24 All-Defensive First Team selections, Jordan, Scottie Pippen, David Robinson and Karl Malone were all no-nonsense defenders capable of shutting down anyone.

Team USA 2012 may have outside shooting in Kobe, Durant, Deron Williams and James Harden, but the Dream Team had Larry Bird -- twice 50-40-90 -- and fellow sharpshooter Chris Mullin.

whether seven games or one, the Dream Team's experience to come up big will define them. at the time of the Barcelona Games, they had already played almost 200 more playoff games than the current one; they possessed 12 rings compared to seven; in the remote scenario it goes to clutch, Kobe and Durant can take the final shot but what if you're facing Magic, Larry Legend, Chuck and MJ? who do you guard?

yet for me, what really set the Dream Team apart was one crucial characteristic people forget -- in the world of pro basketball, an egoistic go-to man is common, but the '92 collection of superstars managed to put 'team' above 'individual', personal stats below completely bamboozling opponents. Chuck, of all people, led the team in scoring, with just a mellow 18 points per game.

six-time NBA champion Pippen believes his class can beat 2012's squad by 25 points. three-time MVP Bird was shrewd, "They probably could [beat us]. I haven't played in 20 years and we're all old now."

Point Guard

Magic Johnson, John Stockton vs Chris Paul, Deron Williams, Russell Westbrook

whatever Paul, Deron and Westbrook can conjure, assist-and-steal phenom Stockton can in his sleep. i won't discuss Magic.

Shooting Guard

Michael Jordan, Clyde Drexler, Chris Mullin vs Kobe Bryant, James Harden

the most fascinating matchup, but Jordan's GOAT.

Small Forward

Larry Bird, Scottie Pippen vs LeBron James, Carmelo Anthony, Andre Iguodala

on any other day, LeBron can claim to be the best. Pippen will give LBJ a run for his money, but right now, Bird is still ahead.

Power Forward

Charles Barkley, Karl Malone, Christian Laettner vs Kevin Durant, Anthony Davis

the Barkley-Malone one-two punch more than makes up for Durant's superpowers.

Centre

Patrick Ewing, David Robinson vs Tyson Chandler, Kevin Love

the most lopsided contest. Ewing and Robinson are legends. Chandler meanwhile has had two okay seasons. Love is getting there, but not quite there.

Spain Again

despite all the chatter across what can be called a game-changing tournament, the script for Euro 2012's final read all too familiar.

Spain versus a pretender, and Spain outplaying the pretender.

it is familiar not that La Roja only managed 52% of possession against Italy, but that they again lifted the trophy at the end of the contest, the first time a national side has won three straight major competitions.

substitute Juan Mata providing the icing on the cake with Spain's fourth.

four unanswered goals may be cool, but it's silly to read much into it since the Azzurri completely capitulated when down to 10 men. what is of significance is that the Spaniards have now defended their Euro title, never before done in this highly competitive cup.

unlike their club-level doppelganger Barcelona, who bulge the net for fun, Spain do blow hot and cold. but what stands as a fact is the Spanish tiki-taka plays fellow pros off the field in a majestic display of resilience. Spain, unbelievably, have now kept clean sheets in all their knockout games these three victorious campaigns.

acclaim was showered on Spain after Euro 2008 and World Cup 2010, but a long overdue debate has finally begun -- are we witnessing the greatest national team ever?

Zinedine Zidane's France 1998-2000 were unstoppable, the Mighty Magyars of Hungary 1950-56 were stuff of legend, Franz Beckenbauer's Germany 1972-76 have to be the vintage from that sterling nation, while the omnipresent contender is Brazil 1970. but this is a subject for another day.

a success or not?

i call Euro 2012 a game-changer because tactics are slowly evolving in the modern sport again.

for one, the Italians showed that a three-man defence isnt outdated and can still work. it didnt last long but i reckon it would have worked anyhow.

furthermore, they got so many things right tactically, paving a way to the final. the midfield wasnt a diamond, dont let writers fool you. Italy's 4-1-3-1-1 ensured the middle of the park was dynamic and suffocating for the opposition.

cards couldn't stop Riccardo Montolivo and Claudio Marchisio.

this essentially summarises a key characteristic at Euro 2012 --the removal of traditional wingers. other teams opting for this include champions Spain, semi-finalists Germany and Portugal, France, England, Russia, Ukraine and the Netherlands.

Spain, of course, were never a wing team, and most notably introduced here a ball-keeping strategy of six midfielders. the main duty of Cristiano Ronaldo, Franck Ribery, Alan Dzagoev, Andriy Yarmolenko, Yevhen Konoplyanka, Arjen Robben is to bomb the opposing goal. Lukas Podolski, Marco Reus and Andre Schurrle did the same for the Germans.

Russia, for all the flak they've gotten for an underwhelming exit, brought a breathtaking brand of football that involved multiple lines in the final third and interchanging players. more than once their opponents were left flat-footed, so it was a major surprise the strategy failed so badly against Greece.

negativity

Euro 2012 succeeded on a few fronts. the overall disciplinary record is good and the "Respect" campaign was upheld well with little playacting, scuffles or hounding of referees. off the field though left much to be desired, UEFA having to step in several times to sanction participating countries for fan behaviour.

football always needs a touch of unpredictability, and this tournament succeeded in that despite throwing up several, like Italy's run, the Netherlands' and Russia's exit, and the final-day drama in Group D, we can safely say there was no terrible injustice (except maybe Ukraine should be in the quarters?).

what is regrettable, was the negativity amidst admirable intentions to entertain. the eventual winners were labelled "boring" on many occasions, seemingly content to pass the ball sideward than forward. flair teams Sweden, Croatia, Ukraine, Russia and the Netherlands took the early flight home.

those latter two were responsible for the most shots in a game, 31 against Greece and 32 against Denmark, but both lost.

quarter-finalists Czech and France put in appalling performances -- the Czechs couldn't muster a shot on target against Portugal while the French played to lose against Spain. the flagbearer of negativity at this tournament, England, gave us one of the worst showings in recent memory during their defeat to Italy, when their most frequent passing combo was between keeper Joe Hart and big man Andy Carroll.

whether it's negativity or an evolution of tactics, the striker role is declining. many teams played with one (or less hurhur) here, and the top scorers only had three goals. the last time this number made you top scorer, whether in the Euro or World Cup, was 1992. 

the Dutch need another Dennis Bergkamp, who was only 23 when he scored three at Euro 92.

it's a wrap

before Euro 2012 began i compiled an Idiot's Guide. i look back rather fondly now.

what did i get right? Andrea Pirlo, Mario Gomez, Mario Balotelli, Steven Gerrard, Antonio Cassano, Dzagoev and Yarmolenko had a superb campaign. Yohan Cabaye, the German central defence and Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain emerged as international stars. Ivan Perisic did fairly well but it wasnt enough to send Croatia through.

on the flipside, Rasmus Elm didnt meet my expectations, while Klaas-Jan Huntelaar, Christian Eriksen and Yann M'Vila made no impact whatsoever considering their reputations.

regarding the David Villa spot, Vicente del Bosque's answer was a false nine, but when needed, he preferred Fernando Torres over my preferred Alvaro Negredo and Fernando Llorente.

lastly, the likes of Mario Goetze, Kevin Strootman, Mathieu Valbuena, Tomas Necid and Fabio Borini couldn't even get minutes, although their future is surely bright.

best xi

• Manuel Neuer is for me the best goalie in the world, while Gianluigi Buffon's experience is unparalleled. but Iker Casillas edges them by being both of that. no other man you rather have between the sticks at Euro 2012.
• Czech's Theodor Gebre Selassie was the only right-back who impressed, but the full-back role was dominated by left-sided men this tournament. versatile German skipper Philip Lahm switches to the right in my team, while Jordi Alba tops Fabio Coentrao, who was all-action but not exactly effective.
• Sergio Ramos is the casualty as I want Daniele de Rossi in my team, but midfield's too packed for him. after all, he deserves credit for giving some of the best centre-back performances here, despite not being one.
• going with Andrea Pirlo as the sole regista is no doubt enough, but given the attacking talent upfront, i pick an additional Steven Gerrard, who was Captain Fantastic for England. these two edge Xabi Alonso by carrying their countries on their own backs. Russia's Igor Denisov is also worth a mention, for achieving the mean feat of second-most completed passes during the group stage.
• no prizes for who's first overall, and despite a rather average campaign, i trust no one more than Xavi, especially when im circling him with partner-in-crime Andres Iniesta and David Silva. Mesut Oezil gets no place, while Greek man-of-war Giorgos Karagounis, Poland's talisman Kuba and Czech workhorse Petr Jiracek deserve mentions.
• strikers dont need partners these days, and i almost went for the invincible Cristiano Ronaldo, but taking into account his fluffed shots all tournament, i decided on the outstanding Mario Balotelli. following closely in third is Zlatan Ibrahimovic, while Mario Mandzukic's three goals and the combined four of Danes Nicklas Bendtner and Michael Krohn Dehli make them dangerous.

best subs

they're all forwards, but that's what they're for -- impact players.

two of the best footballers sitting at Euro 2012's benches (excluding Spain's) must be Antonio di Natale and Miroslav Klose. the former was Serie A's top scorer for 2010 and 2011, the latter has more than 60 international goals.

it was wise that the coaches sent them on regularly, two players who dont just give you fresh legs, but whole new problems for opponents.

winger Jesus Navas is one of del Bosque's fave replacements, and he always adds a different dimension to Spain's game. for that one critical moment, i pick Silvestre Varela, whose winner from nowhere against Denmark was priceless.

finally, how can i ignore Fernando Torres. i hate him, but he took home the Golden Boot off the bench. that's something.

breakout stars

it was a thrill to watch my prediction unfold in front of my eyes as early as Matchday One. with three goals and some wondrous play, Dzagoev is sure to hit the big time now.

not sure why Schalke's top defender Kyriakos Papadopoulos was not a guaranteed starter for Greece, but he seized his opportunity soon after and showed viewers the sleep-inducing team has players to watch for.

and at just 23, Vaclav Pilar's departure from the woeful Czech league will be keenly watched. the winger grabbed two goals and a man-of-the-match at this tournament.

best collective performance

the final was a washout and it was done against the 2006 World Cup winners so no point i rejig that.

among other games, Denmark's stunning victory over the Netherlands was one, plus co-hosts Ukraine's choking of Sweden. the Swedes hit back later with an eye-catching win at France, but that came too late.

the tight Group A saw some interesting matches. Russia destroyed Czech on Matchday One with breathtaking football, in a tie expected to be close. but the capitulating Russians allowed Poland and then Greece some amazing performances too. the Poles came into Euro 2012 lowest ranked, but turned the tables on their former rulers. on the other hand, we all know what happened in the Greeks' do-or-die game.

Italy will be remembered for a dominant display against England and a flawless one at Germany, who themselves were the form team up till the semis, toying with the Netherlands and steamrolling Greece.

on a whole Portugal had an average tournament, but they did manage to be the first country in a long time to put Spain on the backfoot, in their titanic semi-final. unfortunately they came out second-best.

best goals

• Ibrahimovic's sublime scissors kick vs France

• Danny Welbeck's backheel winner vs Sweden

• Balotelli's difficult finish off the bench vs Ireland

• and when the ball was sent towards Balotelli against Germany, you just felt something special was coming.

worst players

• Aleksandr Kerzhakov, Russia's chief striker who put the ball wide every of his 14 attempts, setting a championship record. the media later used his name as a synonym for missing a chance.
• i pity the Czechs, who have to depend on over-the-hill striker Milan Baros. he needed 217 minutes of football to get his first shot on target.
• as is the case at previous major tournaments, Helder Postiga was woeful.
• the whole Netherlands team, with special mentions for Arjen Robben, Huntelaar, Mark van Bommel and Maarten Stekelenburg. i wanted to include Ireland too but hey at least they weren't expected to win the goddamn tournament.
• the Portuguese had some good defensive displays at Euro 2012, but Bruno Alves did not contribute to them. 
• Federico Balzaretti, Italy's worst starter and antagonist in Cesare Prandelli's nightly nightmares.
• Wojciech Szczesny was a goalkeeper sent off on Matchday One and never returned to the lineup.
• much was expected of veteran Anatoliy Tymoshchuk, a Bayern Munich player, to be the foundation for Andriy Shevchenko, Yarmolenko and Konoplyanka. he was crap.

疯神无双 疯秘笈

梦游

在作梦的时候起來遊走

就叫梦游

在作梦的时候说的话

就叫做梦话

梦里面的世界

就叫做梦境

在梦里面的人

就叫做梦中人

如果在梦里面遗失了东西...

不要担心 醒过來就沒事了

Real Life Soldiers Who Make Rambo Look Like a Pussy

source: Cracked.com

We all understand that action movies are cheesy escapism. After all, could one commando really take out a whole compound full of bad guys?

Actually, yes. It turns out the history books are full of stories of soldiers doing things so badass they'd hesitate to put them into a film for fear of killing the realism. Like these men, for example.

Simo Hayha

Simo Hayha had a fairly boring life in Finland. He served his one mandatory year in the military, and then became a farmer. But when the Soviet Union invaded his homeland in 1939, he decided he wanted to help his country.

Since the majority of fighting took place in the forest, he figured the best way to stop the invasion was to grab his trusty rifle, a couple of cans of food and hide in a tree all day shooting Russians. In six feet of snow. And 20-40 degrees below zero.

Can you spot Hayha? Neither could the Russians.

Of course when the Russians heard that dozens of their men were going down and that it was all one dude with a rifle, they got fucking scared. He became known as "The White Death" because of his white camouflage outfit, and they actually mounted whole missions just to kill that one guy.

They started by sending out a task force to find Hayha and take him out. He killed them all.
Then they tried getting together a team of counter-snipers (which are basically snipers that kill snipers) and sent them in to eliminate Hayha. He killed all of them, too.

Over the course of 100 days, Hayha killed 542 people with his rifle. He took out another 150 or so with his SMG, sending his credited kill-count up to 705.

Since everyone they had was either too dead or too scared to go anywhere near him, the Russians just carpet-bombed everywhere they thought he might be. Supposedly, they had the location right, and he actually got hit by a cloud of shrapnel that tore his coat up, but didn't actually hurt him, because he's the fucking White Death, damn it.

Finally on March 6th, 1940, some lucky bastard shot Hayha in the head with an exploding bullet. When some other soldiers found him and brought him back to base, he "had half his head missing." The White Death had finally been stopped...

...for about a week. In spite of having come down with a nasty case of shot-in-the-face syndrome, he was still very much alive, and regained consciousness on March 13, the very day the war ended.

Yogendra Singh Yadav

Yogendra Singh Yadav was a member of an Indian grenadier battalion during a conflict with Pakistan in 1999. Their mission was to climb "Tiger Hill" (actually a big-ass mountain), and neutralize the three enemy bunkers at the top. Unfortunately, this meant climbing up a sheer hundred-foot cliff-face of solid ice. Since they didn't want to all climb up one at a time with ice-axes, they decided they'd send one guy up, and he'd fasten the ropes to the cliff as he went, so everyone else could climb up the sissy way. Yadav, being awesome, volunteered.

Half way up the icy cliff-o'-doom, enemies stationed on an adjacent mountain opened fire, shooting them with an RPG, then spraying assault-rifle fire all over the cliff. Half his squad was killed, including the commander, and the rest were scattered and disorganized. Yadav, in spite of being shot three times, kept climbing.

 

When he reached the top, one of the target bunkers opened fire on him with machine guns. Yadav ran toward the hail of bullets, pitched a grenade in the window and killed everyone inside. By this point the second bunker had a clear shot and opened fire, so he ran at them, taking bullets while he did, and killed the four heavily-armed men inside with his bare hands.

Meanwhile, the remainder of his squad was standing at the top of the cliff staring at him saying, "dude, holy shit!" They then all went and took the third bunker with little trouble.

For his gallantry and sheer ballsiness, he was awarded the Param Vir Chakra, India's highest military award. Unlike the Medal of Honor, the Param Vir Chakra is only given for "rarest of the rare gallantry which is beyond the call of duty and which in normal life is considered impossible to do." That's right, you actually have to break the laws of reality just to be eligible.

It has only been awarded 21 times, and two thirds of the people who earned it died in the process. It was initially reported that Yadav had as well, but it turns out that they just mistook him for someone less badass. Or they just figured no real human being could survive a broken leg, shattered arm and 10-15 fresh bullet holes in one sitting.